Creating Illusions
The inner narrative
I often emphasize the power of creating illusions when discussing the nervous system with my clients. It's about having a "constructive" dialogue with your brain and body. The topic of happiness, while similar, requires a slightly different approach. If you're looking for a realist, I'm your person. I've also been conditioned to be a pessimist, recognizing these traits as survival and defense mechanisms rooted in unpleasantness and negativity. These responses are evolutionary; a level-headed person wouldn't run from a tiger while laughing or wave at a sniper targeting them. The body's mantra is "better safe than sorry," though individual personalities and emotional intensities vary.
Realism and pessimism play crucial roles in our lives. However, if you allow negative thoughts to dominate and create your existence around a toxic inner narrative, your body may become mentally and physically sick. Constant negative thinking can strain your nervous system, leading to tension, anxiety, and a narrowed perspective. This can create a mental loop of perceived threats.
It's important to remember that we have a choice. The negative illusions created by pessimism are just as much illusions as the positive ones. Understanding this can help you choose a more balanced and healthier perspective.
Some paint or a wrecking ball for you?
Happiness is linked to numerous positive outcomes: it can make us more helpful and altruistic, improve our conflict resolution skills, foster creative and original thinking, and enhance our immune system, among other benefits.
Research indicates that once basic needs (food, security, shelter) are met, happiness largely stems from internal efforts. The amount of effort required varies based on personality and environment. Happiness is a crucial aspect of overall wellbeing, and the positive nuances we create for ourselves and others are significant. While our thoughts are influenced by external factors and evolutionary mechanisms, ultimately, we are responsible for them. Thoughts originate within us, regardless of the complexity of our surroundings.
Desiring a happy, content life is natural, and it's our responsibility to achieve it, regardless of life's challenges. If finding happiness seems difficult, it might help to remember that we are all temporary visitors here. We are not in a position to ask favors; it should be very much the other way around. This doesn't mean ignoring negative emotions or events—they play essential roles—but rather improving our ability to determine which thoughts, emotions, and actions serve a beneficial purpose, especially in the long run.
We have all the tools we need, but they differ for everyone depending on timing and context. You might need paint to transform your wall into your favorite color, adding that touch of daily happiness. Meanwhile, I’ve realized that what I'm doing isn't working for me, and I need a wrecking ball to tear down everything I’ve built and start fresh. We have different paths to make it work, but eventually, we get there if we remain realistic, flexible, and determined.
It's a mistaken illusion to think we can control life to ensure our happiness. However, we can and should learn to control the positive illusions we create about ourselves and our traits. The more we use certain neural pathways, the more established they become, making them the default choice for our thoughts. Human body is an engine that is coded to save energy in all costs, so it will take the easy way out in good and in bad - why not turn this into Your benefit?
5.2024
